In times of transition, there is a natural tendency to rush to rebirth, quickly back into the known, in an urgent attempt to fix, maintain, or heal that which is dying. It is so ordinary, so human, so precious really to resist falling apart and prioritise putting it all back together.
There was an old belief that as our hearts opened, the vulnerability would diminish, the terror would fall away, the tenderness would yield, that we'd not care so much about others and the world, resting in some safe, constructed place of observation beyond it all… BUT we are more raw now than ever before.
Somehow, everything and everyone matter now more than ever, in spontaneous, unexpected ways.
We are seeing that love continues to ask us to feel more, to hold and metabolize the full-spectrum of our current overwhelmed and broken open reality.
It is only within the womb of death that re-birth can emerge.
The invitation of the dark world, spiraling out of the depths, slow and frightening in Her call – is to not abandon death for it is the seed of life. To not take short cuts through the chaos and to remember that rebirth is not possible without embodied engagement in the process of dissolution - a noble pathway of immense creativity.
As our cells reassemble themselves in a new form, something new is being born inside us, but for this to happen something else needs to die. A trustworthy part of ourselves is no longer permitted to continue the journey onwards. Allowing the hollowing out as space for what is yet to emerge is a vital step in the process of transformation. Rather than prematurely forcing rebirth to emerge, lets turn into the uncertainty, the fear, the overwhelm, the contradictions, and the purity of death as the counterpart to life.
Once a willing step is taken into the hollow womb portal we will be gutted and reformed by the very force of nature Herself. Right here the raw materials of resurrection are woven into being by Her, the Great Weaver.
Yes the mind will be utterly disorientated, longing for resolution, but trust the body, she knows. Trust in the fires of disintegration. And the birth that can arise only from the ashes of that level of grace.
May we honour all the forms of Love as Love comes hurtling into our lives – shattering our hearts, our hopes and dreams, all that is known to us. May we stay strong in our vulnerability as we allow it all to matter – the people, the places, the memories, the dreams, – taking the risk to allow it all to touch us, as we wander into the mystery. But equally allow it all to dissolve so that new forms may emerge.
The dissolution is holy, a sacred passageway through to emergence as we rise steadily from the ashes over and over again.
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📷 Uli Mattes
LOCATION: The beach for the Awakening As Woman Summer Retreat 2019